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psycho Marxy
Demon stone's host
Joined: 09 Jan 2004
Posts: 1
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 Posted: Fri Jan 09, 2004 12:58 pm Post subject: Blood Fang |
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First the story
A mysterious sword emerged from the earth. Many warriors have tried to use it. Some died trying to get to it. Others who were unfortunate enough to wield it felt an uncontrolable surge of blood lust. The wielder often killed anything that moved. Once it's host died, A new host would suffer the same fate. One day four people recieved the burden of a royal quest to find and destroy this blood hungry blade known only as the blood fang. Not only do the four have to fight hordes of demons protecting it, some one wants to use the blood fang for his own selfish purposes. Accompanied by three others, He will be a near impossible enemy to thwart.
Characters:
Cyrus Maibe: Swordman(Fire)
Attoch Lightbringer: Paladin(Holy/Water)
Kenji Sagara: Swordsman(Wind)
Wing Fei Zhan: Merchant(Earth)
Rivals
Malakai-Thief(fire)
Rongar-Beastmaster(Earth)
Prae-Archer(wind)
Tea-Wizzard(water/ice) |
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JSH357
Joined: 02 Feb 2003
Posts: 1705
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| Posted: Fri Jan 09, 2004 6:52 pm Post subject: |
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Your characters sound a lot like the cast of Ends of the Earth 2...
Maybe it's just a coincidence.
Anyway, here comes the bullets.
Post #666!
WHOO!
| Quote: | | A mysterious sword emerged from the earth. Many warriors have tried to use it. Some died trying to get to it. Others who were unfortunate enough to wield it felt an uncontrolable surge of blood lust. The wielder often killed anything that moved. Once it's host died, A new host would suffer the same fate. |
Direct Lord of the Rings rip-off. Come on man, that one is obvious.
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One day four people recieved the burden of a royal quest to find and destroy this blood hungry blade known only as the blood fang. Not only do the four have to fight hordes of demons protecting it, some one wants to use the blood fang for his own selfish purposes. Accompanied by three others, He will be a near impossible enemy to thwart. |
Uninteresting. None of the characters have any depth whatsoever.
| Quote: |
Characters:
Cyrus Maibe: Swordman(Fire)
Attoch Lightbringer: Paladin(Holy/Water)
Kenji Sagara: Swordsman(Wind)
Wing Fei Zhan: Merchant(Earth)
Rivals
Malakai-Thief(fire)
Rongar-Beastmaster(Earth)
Prae-Archer(wind)
Tea-Wizzard(water/ice)
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Again, elaborate more on the characters. Who are they? Where are they from? What do they like? What do they dislike? What are their flaws? Etc. |
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Marxy
Owner of the demon stone
Joined: 10 Jan 2004
Posts: 8
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| Posted: Sat Jan 10, 2004 11:52 am Post subject: |
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[quote="JSH357"]Your characters sound a lot like the cast of Ends of the Earth 2...
Maybe it's just a coincidence.
Anyway, here comes the bullets.
Post #666!
WHOO!
[/qoute]
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Direct Lord of the Rings rip-off. Come on man, that one is obvious.
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I saw Soul Calubur rip-off comming... Hey, A sword's doing the damage(a la Nightmare)
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Uninteresting. None of the characters have any depth whatsoever. |
They've been called upon for a royal quest... Though the leaders of both parties develop a huge agenda against eachother
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Again, elaborate more on the characters. Who are they? Where are they from? What do they like? What do they dislike? What are their flaws? Etc. |
I'll post them right after I finnish this quote! |
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LeRoy_Leo
Project manager
Class S Minstrel
Joined: 24 Sep 2003
Posts: 2683
Location: The dead-center of your brain!
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| Posted: Tue Jan 13, 2004 3:23 pm Post subject: |
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It all sounds very much like the Inuyasha plot if you ask me... Hordes of demons. Is the sword a fang? Because if it is then this IS an Inuyasha rip off...
But go for it. I am sure with a little more work it could be way different than any of the similar games and stories out there. (When stories like that are similar, that just means that they are true). It is all in the presentation. 
PS: A lot of stories have hordes of demons represent evil. Just thought I would point that out to myself.
_________________
Planning Project Blood Summons, an MMORPG which will incinerate all of the others with it's sheer brilliance...
---msw188 ---
"Seriously James, you keep rolling out the awesome like gingerbread men on a horror-movie assembly line. " |
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T-Master
Joined: 10 Dec 2003
Posts: 74
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| Posted: Tue Jan 13, 2004 3:51 pm Post subject: |
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| This does sound LotR'ish - evil item that no man can wield, so destroy it. |
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Marxy
Owner of the demon stone
Joined: 10 Jan 2004
Posts: 8
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| Posted: Wed Jan 14, 2004 2:02 pm Post subject: |
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First of all....
T-Master,
This may seem LOTR-ish, But the sword was intended to be a rip-off of the soul edge. The wielder of the sword goes insane in blood lust
LeRoy_Leo,
The Bloodfang is a sword! I don't even watch Inuyasha
Any way...
Cyrus' Party
Attoch would normally lead in the cliche RPG, But the hot headad energetic Cyrus leads instead. Cyrus lacks what it takes to fit the conventional hero(i.e. Paitence, Compasion, Self-restraint). Attoch(I named him after the main character of EOTE 2) on the otherhand is a sucker for damsels in distress. Though good hearted, He gets played like a violin. Kenji's a loner and Wing Fei hates Kenji's people |
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JSH357
Joined: 02 Feb 2003
Posts: 1705
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| Posted: Thu Jan 15, 2004 10:25 am Post subject: |
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| In other words, you haven't got a single original idea. Try thinking; it helps. |
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Marxy
Owner of the demon stone
Joined: 10 Jan 2004
Posts: 8
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| Posted: Tue Jan 20, 2004 11:04 am Post subject: |
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Exuse me...
I just wanted to to pay some fan fare to my favourite fighting game that involves swords. As for the cast of characters. Original. Well, Except the Paladin's name. I already covered that... I named him after- What the hell I'll delete the story later to make a new one |
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Setu_Firestorm
Music Composer
Joined: 26 Mar 2003
Posts: 2566
Location: Holiday. FL
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LeRoy_Leo
Project manager
Class S Minstrel
Joined: 24 Sep 2003
Posts: 2683
Location: The dead-center of your brain!
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| Posted: Sun Jan 25, 2004 5:53 pm Post subject: |
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Thread hasn't locked yet. After 5 days? 
FYI: Inuyasha's sword was a sword too, just made from his father's fangs. (Inuyasha is a half demon) Just wanted to straighten that out.
Yea, I would recomend that show, but that would be off topic... Wait... I just did.
Keep it up Marxy. Or is it Psyco marxy... I'm confused.
_________________
Planning Project Blood Summons, an MMORPG which will incinerate all of the others with it's sheer brilliance...
---msw188 ---
"Seriously James, you keep rolling out the awesome like gingerbread men on a horror-movie assembly line. " |
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